Gays vs. Guns

The title of this post may make you think I'm talking about a battle between gays and guns. I'm not. I'm talking about the two big issues in which my opinion differs from the Republican party platform. As I mentioned in my first post (The Checklist), I support same-sex marriage, same-sex adoption, etc. I also mentioned that I support a ban on assault weapons and believe firmly in sensible gun control.

These two issues may appear to have nothing in common, but they are actually both based in the same argument. People who are against any sort of gun control argue that it is an infringement on their Second Amendment right to bear arms. People who support marriage equality argue that laws that forbid same-sex marriage deny people of their basic constitutional right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Usually (not always, but usually), those who are against gun control are also against same-sex marriage. I find this very puzzling. Intelligent people who argue that taking guns away from law abiding citizens is wrong, because it is an infringement on our constitutional rights and if you permit the government to start taking rights away, then you open the door to the possibility of more rights being taken away. I respect that argument and I understand that argument. I'll admit, I don't feel the need to own a gun (I've never even held one), and I wouldn't feel like my rights have been infringed if guns were banned, but I respect the opinion of those who feel this way. That said, I have to wonder why many of these people who believe so much in these basic, fundamental rights, don't extend this same right to gays and lesbians.

When it comes to relationships, gays and lesbians want the same things the rest of us want. They want to meet the right person, fall in love, and get married. Like heterosexual couples, many of them want children, too. (My husband and I don't want children, but we recognize that most couples do.) As an American, I believe people have the right to be with the person they want to be with and it's no one else's business, but their own. Our party has not only withheld its support for the rights of gays to marry, but it actually added support for a ban on gay marriage to the platform shortly before the 2012 Republican National Convention. I was very upset by this. It's one thing to avoid the issue, but it's another thing to take a stance that is so exclusionary. This move alienated many gay voters. I have gay friends who have told me they would consider voting for a Republican presidential candidate, but after the party's stance against gay marriage, they felt they had no choice, but to vote for Obama.

As a political party, why are we doing this? Why are we excluding people who want the same things we do? Why are we excluding people who get up in the morning, go to work, work hard, and go home to their loved ones at the end of the day? Why are we excluding people who put their children's needs before their own? Why are we excluding people who pay taxes? Why are we excluding people who own homes? Why are Why are we excluding our friends, neighbors, co-workers, siblings, cousins, children, etc.? Why are we excluding a man who loves another man and a woman who loves another woman, yet we're willing to fight tooth and nail for a piece of machinery that is designed to kill? Why?

Some people believe that it is unnatural to be in a same-sex relationship. Sure for heterosexual people it is unnatural, but it's perfectly natural for gay people. I firmly believe sexual preference is something a person is born with and it is unfair to deny someone of the basic right to marry, because the person he or she loves is the same gender. What makes a heterosexual relationship superior to a homosexual one?I am a family law attorney, and I promise you, heterosexual relationships are in no way superior to homosexual ones. I have witnessed a lot of ugliness between straight couples. A lot of vengeance, pettiness, cruelty, use of children as pawns, anger, hatred, etc. I'm not saying gay couples don't resort to these tactics when a relationship ends, but the point is straight couples are no better than gay couples and vice versa. The relationships are equal and should be treated equally in the eyes of the law.

I don't expect the Republican party to do a complete about-face on this issue, but I hope the party can back off from the ban on gay marriage and at least have a dialogue. I didn't always feel the way I do about gay marriage. I used to believe only in civil unions, but didn't support marriage. As time went on, I matured and I learned more, then I realized there is no reason a same-sex union should be called something different from an opposite-sex union. I believe many in our party feel the same as me and those who don't can change their opinion on this issue as well. At this point, I am asking other members of our party for tolerance...that is all. Let's stop excluding people who probably share many of the same values as us and let's start including people.

Thanks for listening,

The Urban Republican

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